Parenting Twins
Parenting twins can be physically and mentally exhausting
First, when parenting twins, consider the physical and mental exhaustion of the primary caregiver. Parents who must take care of their children are not only mentally exhausted, but also physically and emotionally exhausted and prone to depression. Children may also have difficulty forming secure attachments with their parents.
In these cases, you may need someone to help with household chores or take full responsibility for one child. This assistance should continue until the children are well past the age of 3. It is better for parents to leave household chores to others and take care of parenting if possible. If the person helping the parents is also involved in parenting the babies, it is best if the person has similar parenting styles and views.
How to parent twins
- As parents, give each twin individual attention and make them feel loved and respected.
- Praise each twin's individuality and work to bring out their strengths.
- Encourage each twin to have their own opinions and express their thoughts.
- When talking to twins, talk to each person individually rather than talking to both of them at once. It's also a good idea to take your children out shopping or for a walk often to spend some quality time with each child.
- Don’t compare twins to each other or to other children their age. When there is disagreement in opinions, try to handle it fairly, and if necessary, roll a coin or dice to determine order or make a decision.
- When talking to twins, make equal eye contact with both of them, focus your attention on the conversation, and pay attention to what they are saying.
- While some competition may be desirable, be careful not to overdo it, as it can lead to conflict and jealousy.
- Encourage your twin children to have plenty of social contact.
- Twins may have delayed language development because they imitate each other, become attached to and dependent on each other, and use words that only they can understand. However, when you send them to childhood education centers (such as childcare centers and kindergartens) where they can interact with other children, this will be very helpful for their social and language development.
- In male-female twins, the girl is sometimes more sociable, active, and controlling of her male sibling. Additionally, male twins may be more docile and less aggressive than their peers and may even let their female twin handle things. Be careful to prevent male twins from being overly shy or passive.
(Source : Professor Kim Hye-geum, Department of Childcare Education, Dongnam Health University, Collection of Childcare Counseling and Childcare Information)